I Love You

John 15:9-17

William F. Schnell

May 17, 2009

 

Today we are concluding a four part series of sermons from the Gospel of John, with today’s text following immediately upon the one we considered last week.  Both come from what has been called Jesus’ “Farewell Discourse,” which was immediately followed by his arrest and crucifixion.  Jesus knew that the hour of his departure from this earth was close at hand, and he wanted to say certain things to his closest disciples while he still had the chance.  If we were parting with loved ones for the last time, I am sure that we would want to tell them we loved them.  This is what Jesus wanted to tell his disciples, and this is reflected in the title of our message for this morning: “I Love You.” 

 

Some of us say “I Love You” quite frequently to those we love.  Nancy and I have children who are quite liberal in telling us “I Love You,” and yet there is also an aversion to the phrase that has made itself known in our family.  Mary went on a date with a fellow I thought was rather winsome.  He reminded me of me, so how could I not like him?  Unfortunately one of the tendencies we shared was speaking first and thinking later.  On his first date with Mary he told her he loved her.  That was it for that relationship.  Mary thought it was a weird thing to say under the circumstances and never went out with him again.

 

The usual caricature envisions the amorous fellow with prurient interest trying real hard to compromise a young lady’s virtue until in a moment of heated passion she confesses: “I love you,” and the poor guy recoils from her embrace to choke on his words as he notices the hour is getting late and he must go.  Or, as in the case of a song by Meatloaf, his lust is so great that he pledges to love her until the end of time if she will give in to his advances, which she does.  Then the song abruptly changes with the following lyrics: “Now I’m waiting for the end of time so I can end my time with you.” 

 

Some people have a hard time saying, “I love you,” and I have been one of them.  My father comes from the Amish/Mennonite tradition having been born and raised in Berlin, Ohio.  My experience with the plain people is that they are not wordy in general and verbally expressive of affection in particular.  In short, I did not grow up in a family where you heard “I love you” spoken.  It was understood that we did love each other deeply, almost as if it was something to sacred to mention. 

 

However, as my parents aged I found myself wanting to say this to them but not knowing quite how.  It wasn’t until my father was being wheeled into open heart surgery that I blurted out, “I love you Dad.”  This caused him to rise up on his gurney and look back at me with a quizzical expression as if to say, “This must be more serious than I thought.”  But what he did say was, “I love you too.”  As it turned out, it was more serious than we thought for Dad never returned home from the hospital. 

 

He ended up spending several weeks in ICU and then several weeks more in a rehab hospital where he died.  But during these weeks I would take every opportunity to kiss his head and say, “I love you, Dad.”  He had a tracheal tube in his throat, but he would mouth the words, “I love you too.”  After a long time struggling to get up the courage to say those words, do you know what I discovered?  As the Staples Office Supplies button puts it, “That was easy.”  It wasn’t hard at all.  Now I tell my Mom that I love her all the time.

 

Just before Jesus died, he told his disciples that he loved them.  As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you (Verse 9).  God loves his children with a great love.  We will get to what that means in a moment.  But Jesus wants his disciples to know that he has loved them with a great love too—complete and unconditional love.  But then he says something that almost sounds as if his love is contingent upon something required of his disciples.

 

He says, Now remain in my love.  If you obey my commands, you will remain in my love, just as I have obeyed my Father’s commands and remain in his love (Verses 9-10).  What kind of love is that?  Does that mean if we don’t obey Jesus’ commands he won’t love us anymore?  Jesus is not saying, “Obey my commands and I will love you,” he is saying, “Obey my commands and you will remain in my love.”  To remain in the love of Christ is to love like he loves—to love with a great love. 

 

How do we know this is what he means?  We know it because of the command we are called to obey.  Jesus said, My command is this: Love each over as I have loved you (Verse 12).  When we love each other as he loved us, we remain in his love—we remain in the love of Christ.  This begs the question, “How has Jesus loved us?”  What does it mean to love others as he has loved us?  What are the characteristics of a great love?

 

Jesus continues: Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends (Verse 13).  In a few moments Jesus is going to demonstrate the greatest love of all.  He is going to be arrested and tried and crucified.  He is not going to run away and escape while he has the chance.  He is not going to recant to placate his detractors.  He is going to lay down his life in keeping with God’s plan of salvation.  The greatest love is always a self-sacrificing love. 

 

Saying “I love you” is one thing.  Demonstrating it is another.  Indeed, without a demonstration of self-sacrifice, saying “I love you” is empty and meaningless.  Jesus is telling his disciples that he wants them to remain in his love—to remain loving each other as he has loved them.  And he is not only telling the 12 disciples this in his Farewell Discourse just prior to his passion, he is telling all who would follow him--including you and me—that we should love each other with a self-sacrificing love. 

 

Despite a devastating economic downturn, so many in this family of faith have made a significant personal sacrifice to continue Christ’s ministry at The Church in Aurora through their Faith Promises.  They have not just said, “I love you,” they have demonstrated their love in a tangible way when it was most needed.  The ministry of this congregation is ongoing, far-reaching and important to those who benefit from it.  They are the beneficiaries of someone else’s self-sacrificing love, as I am.  This is not only my church home, it is my livelihood.  As a staff person, I understand the extraordinary generosity which has made my continuing livelihood possible during a time of increasing unemployment.

 

The staff of this church feels your self-sacrificing love.  I want you to know that your staff loves you too--in self-sacrificing ways.  They too make exceedingly generous Faith Promises, and they too increase their Faith Promises significantly even as their personal investments suffer the same consequences of the economic downturn.  This past year they voluntarily returned their Christmas gift to the church.  There was not a single complaint when budgetary constraints precluded a cost of living increase for this year.  One has offered a reduction in hours during the summer months.  Several have offered reduced compensation if that is what it takes to continue Christ’s ministry at The Church in Aurora.

 

Right now, we are holding our own.  Sometimes it seems as if we have bottomed out and things are going to get better.  Other times it seems as if another shoe could drop.  Thanks to the loving sacrifices of our members in times past, we have some reserves to draw upon under extraordinary circumstances.  Whether this moment qualifies as such has yet to be determined.  But should all contingency plans be exhausted, you should know that your full-time professional staff stands ready to do what we have to do to preserve and protect this ministry.  I cannot speak for the part-time support staff because I have not spoken to them about it, but I will say that they often exceed us full-timers in grace and virtue.

 

In short, we love you and we know that you love us.  Isn’t that good to know?  One time Rev. Horak came into my office after I have been in the saddle a year or so.  I guess he had been watching me operate for awhile and was finally satisfied about something.  He said, “You really do love this church don’t you?”  That remark said so much more about him than it did me.  It said that he loved the church and that it was important to him that I loved it too.  It is important that we know that about one another and it is important that we tell one another from time to time.

 

So I have something I want to say to you.  I love you.  I care about you.  I want the best for you.  I will sacrifice for you.  I believe that you love me, that you care about me, that you want the best for me and that you will sacrifice for me.  Well, we have a regular love fest going on here today don’t we?  But it feels good doesn’t it?  The sacrifices we are called to make are never meant to diminish our lives in any way or to rob our joy in living.  Quite the contrary.

 

In our text Jesus says, I have told you this so that my joy may be in you and that your joy may be complete (Verse 11).  Knowing we are loved and capable of loving with a great love is a joyful thing.  We can face anything with joy knowing that.  Some day this tough time we are enduring—this too shall pass.  But a redeeming consequence will be the lasting memory of having demonstrated with our actions the love of Christ we profess with our lips.

 

Now I want to keep a promise to Gil Gilbertson, an absolutely delightful gentleman who is in his mid-ninety’s.  His daughter, Ingrid Cuppage, said that his health was declining.  Because of your great generosity, a pastor like me can go down to Akron to share with him the love of his family of faith.  He was very happy to welcome that!  He was comforted to know that we would mention him by name in our prayers this morning.  He gave a big grin when I told him we would sing his favorite hymn.  Gil is a Swede, and his favorite hymn was composed by well-known Swedish hymnist, Karolina Sandell-Berg.  Please rise as we sing, Day By Day.